songs of today: "Push" Matchbox Twenty, "Always" Saliva, "Coma Black" Marilyn Manson
Ok, I'm sick and fucking tired of everyone making me feel guilty about wanting to be happy and making me feel like shit for the way I'm feeling. I'm sorry I've finally found people who finally make me happy and don't make me feel guilty or like shit. Is that so bad? To want to be happy? I'm tired of people who I love hating me. I just want to belong in a place with a person in their arms without being the butt of everyone's mean comments; without being glared at. But I guess that's everyone's want, now isn't it? So now that I'm beginning to accept that I can and do have to option for that, why don't people want me to be happy? What makes me so different from the next person? I've made mistakes, yes, but then again everyone has and does.
(more later, gotta go for now)
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Honestly, I think some people just get some kind of sick, twisted pleasure from insulting and berating others. And, as much as I am reluctant to say something like this without more details, but if people whom you love always seem to be making you feel bad for the things you like, then maybe you need to re-evaluate their position in your life, and consider if maybe they love you the way you love them? It might be better for you to surround yourself with the people who can accept you for who you are more often and keep the people who can't seem to accept it at a greater distance? ::flinches:: Sorry if I seem blunt... but that's my opinion and I stick by it. I read a great quote recently (but damned if I can remember where I read it) that fits quite nicely here: "When it comes to the mistakes we make, the people that don't matter care, while the people who do matter tend not to". (Quoted from memory, may not be 100% accurate)
ReplyDeleteAlso, I hope I've never made you feel that way. If I ever did it certainly wasn't my intention. ::hugs::
And don't worry about the mistakes you've made. As you said everybody does, it's how we learn and find our way in life. And the person who doesn't make mistakes doesn't have a life worth mentioning.
::nodnod:: yeah. ::small smile and hugs:: i know it is and i wouldn't ask you to change your opinion on something.
ReplyDeleteno, you don't and didn't so hush.
::small nod:: yeah i know. i'm working on it.